Memorize together: Through this series we introduced memorizing scripture together. The passage you’re working on during this series Grow Up is Eph. 4:11-16. Divide your group in to 6 groups. Give them each a slip of paper with one of the six verses in this passage. Have them develop a pantomime for the verse. They need to act out their verse. The other groups guess which verse it is. Once it is guessed they need to recite the verse. The first group that guesses correctly does their pantomime until all of the verses have been covered.
1. Have a few people share stories of giving or getting forgiveness. How did it make them feel?
2. Pastor Lorin had us look at Colossians 3:13. Our forgiveness is supposed to be like God’s. How do you apply that idea in your own life? How does it make a difference in your forgiving of others?
3. What are the steps for forgiveness in Matthew 5:23-25 and Matthew 18:15-17, 21-35? How can you apply them?
4. We looked at the 5 languages of apology. How can knowing yours and other peoples help you?
Three questions were given to help clarify what your language is
-What do I expect the person to say or do?
-What hurts most deeply about this situation?
-How do I apologize to others?
Another way to identify your language is from the book When Sorry Isn’t Enough which includes an Apology Language Profile to help in understanding your apology language. Following are some of the situations with some possible responses. Have your group members spend a few minutes reading and putting a check mark next to how they would respond to each situation. The key to their responses follows. Using their responses and the three questions above have them determine which apology language is most helpful for them.
You were in a crisis and needed help, but your friend ignored your need. He/she should say:
_____ Δ “Saying ‘I’m sorry’ doesn’t feel like it is enough. What more can I say or do to mend our friendship?”
_____ □ “I realize now that I could have been more help to you, and I promise that I’ll do everything I can do to help you if ever you are in trouble again.”
_____ * “I am sincerely sorry and ask you to forgive to me.”
_____ ◊ “I should have been there for you. I’m so sorry I let you down.”
_____ О “I let you down when you needed me the most. I made a terrible mistake.”
At lunch, your server dropped food on you and ruined your shirt. He/she should say:
_____ * “Can you please forgive me for my carelessness?”
_____ ◊ “I am so sorry about that. I feel bad that I’ve ruined your shirt and inconvenienced you like this.”
_____ О “I am normally pretty careful, but I wasn’t careful enough this time. I accept full responsibility for this mess.”
_____ Δ “I would like to reimburse you for your dry cleaning or for the cost of a new shirt. What seems most appropriate to you?”
_____ □ “This has taught me a hard lesson. You can bet that I’ll be even more careful in the future when serving guests.”
A church member blamed you with sole responsibility for the failure of a committee project although he/she shared leadership duties of the committee. He/she should say:
_____ Δ “There is no excuse for my behavior, and the only way I’m going to feel remotely better is to make this right between us. What do you need me to do or say?”
_____ □ “I’m either going to learn how to treat my team members more appropriately, or I’m not going to lead any more committees. I want to grow from this experience.”
_____ * “Please forgive me. I was wrong to blame you, and I pray that you will forgive me.”
_____ ◊ “I can’t believe I blamed you like I did. I really am embarrassed about my behavior, and I’m sorry.”
_____ О “I had just as much to do with the failure of this project as you or anyone else. I should have admitted my
shortcomings in this area.”
Each of the five shapes next to the blanks represents a certain language of apology. Thus, ◊ = Expressing Regret, О = Accepting Responsibility, Δ = Making Restitution, □ = Genuinely Repenting, and * = Requesting Forgiveness. Whichever shape you circled the most times while answering the profile questions is your primary language of apology.
5. Have each group member share what they think is their apology language. How can understanding a person’s apology language help to restore a relationship with them?
Powerpoint Click HERE
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Powerpoint Click HERE